I'm going

I'm going!

I'm bloody terrified.

It's really bizarre to think about the years to come - the years when my "real life" seems to start. It feels as though the past 18 years have been building up to THIS. Working for exams in order to take more exams in order to get into uni. Always working. Always exams. - I don't mean to suggest that the working is going to stop now. Ha. No. I'm pretty sure that's going to step up a notch once I go to Bristol. But it's just really odd to think that all of the learning that I have done, was really just to prove that I was good enough to do more learning.. And, the weirdest part is, I'm not even going to have to think about any of that past learning anymore.

And it's odd that until now I've always had such a clear idea of what came next. GCSEs then college then A levels and applying to uni and then - Well.. here we are.. with everything so undecided. Things could go in any direction. I admit, it is exciting. But, right now, it's more scary than anything else. Literally jumping out of comfort zones into whatever life hands you - and I'm learning how much chance has to do with things and how important it is to grab opportunities when they appear. And although everything is new and things are going to be frightening and uncomfortable - I'm trying to embrace the change, and think of the 'new-ness' as refreshing and rousing rather than something to be afraid of… Trying is the key word there.

.. You can probably tell that I'm a little bit exhausted - I thought it was worth getting one more bit of writing on here before I went away because I can't guarantee wifi.. On the bright side, I can guarantee a choice of boots because I've packed three pairs as well as some fairy lights because I NEED THEM ALL.

Also, James and I went to London on Tuesday so we could spend the day together before I disappear to Chez Mickey. It was really really lovely. We spent hours exploring Brick Lane and Covent Garden and I hope there will be more adventures with him to come. I actually just cried saying goodnight to him because it is going to be SO so weird not having him around. I'm very lucky that I have such an awesome younger brother. He's a goodun. Here are some of his pictures (he's REALLY good) -

And now I'm going to go to sleep because I have to get the train very very early tomorrow. Good night.